IT'S PLAIN ROBBERY

Just how good is the security of the European Parliament? EUseless and it's a fact. As long as you have a credit card sized piece of plastic in cerulean blue you can flash it on your way through the security gates to indicate you are a member of staff. (Trainees get red and visitors get white) If you are at one of those entrances where you have to place it on the gate activator and it doesn't work, a helpful security guard will use his ID and wave you through. If you go PING! in a metal detector along the way, the guards simply ignore it. Today someone wandered through security and onto the indoor street of the main EP concourse then proceeded to rob the EP branch of the ING bank. Then they walked back out of the Parliament. Because the three banks inside the Parliament are deemed secure the staff do not even have a transparent security screen to hide behind.

The story broke as EP security dashed about telling people to lock themselves in their offices whilst they scoured the labyrinthine buildings. They were phoning each other to find out if they were allowed out to the bathroom yet. The Euro Parliament news service kept staff officially in the dark for four hours after the 4pm raid and when people complained sent out a snooty e.mail stating that it's remit was to talk to journalists not MEP's and staff.

Of course if the bank raider chose to stick around there are lots of unlocked empty rooms to hide in odd corners of the Parliament, then there are several cafeterias, a canteen, a gym, a barbers, a laundry, a newsagent, a supermarket, a travel agents for when he's ready to take a holiday with all that cash, perhaps using the Commission to Cayman Islands Shuttle. If he or she fancies another go there is a choice of three bank branches in one EP building and two more in another, an international cash till and a post office are also available.

Then again the EU is plain robbery to start with.